六合彩开奖记录

Skip to main content

Top 六合彩开奖记录

Yoko Ono to receive Edward MacDowell Medal for lifetime achievement

Yoko Ono to receive Edward MacDowell Medal for lifetime achievement

NEW YORK 鈥 One of the country's leading artist residency programs, MacDowell, has awarded a lifetime achievement prize to Yoko Ono. The groundbreaking artist, filmmaker and musician is this year's recipient of the Edward MacDowell Medal, an honor previously given to Stephen Sondheim and Toni…

鈥楾he Taste of Things鈥 is a feast for the senses

鈥楾he Taste of Things鈥 is a feast for the senses

  • Updated

By Eric Beltmann

Special to Conley Media T r芒n Anh H霉ng鈥檚 "The Taste of Things" is no popcorn movie.

Concession stands are downright vulgar compared to the farmhouse kitchen at the center of H霉ng鈥檚 tranquil story about food, art and passion. Set in fin-de-si猫cle rural France, the movie opens with a nearly wordless sequence in which the camera spends half an hour delicately dancing around Dodin, a prominent gourmet chef, and Eug茅nie, his celebrated cook, as they prepare an exquisite meal that will be received by an appreciative company of epicureans.

"The Taste of Things," which screens Friday for a third and final time at the Milwaukee Film Festival (4:30 p.m., Downer Theatre), spurns the whip pans of, say, Hulu鈥檚 "The Bear," choosing to instead extract its ingredients from slow, enchanting gastroclassics like "Babette鈥檚 Feast" and "Big Night." Marked by sensuous colors, natural lighting and rigorous period costumes, the movie鈥檚 autumnal production design reflects the way Dodin and Eug茅nie are meticulous about their process of making elaborate dishes; for them, cooking is an art form, but it鈥檚 also their main language.

When words fail, they speak through food.

There鈥檚 something deeply endearing about the way Dodin and Eug茅nie simultaneously treat recipes, and each other, with reverence. In one vulnerable scene, Dodin scrupulously tailors a table to Eug茅nie鈥檚 palette. The meal is his love letter, of course, which is why he nervously waits for her response. But "The Taste of Things" is more about the constitutional connection 鈥 the mind meld 鈥 between people than simple romance. It knows that relationships can be an art form, too.

Eventually the movie transforms its menu, throwing salt at the viewer in ways that ought not be spoiled. That these turns feel entirely earned owes a great deal to the leads, Beno卯t Magimel and Juliette Binoche. Formerly a real-life power couple, the middle-aged French legends deliver mature, sophisticated performances that seem at ease with the complicated contours of life.

The final passage of "The Taste of Things" presents not one but two perfect closing shots, including a doubled 360degree pan that breathtakingly coalesces H霉ng鈥檚 ideas about what it means to be in harmony, to give and grieve, and to find renewal. Like the gorgeous Vietnamese summer opening to H霉ng鈥檚 "The Vertical Ray of the Sun" 鈥 one of my favorite moments in all of cinema 鈥 it achieves a rare ambrosial effect.

Baked into the Milwaukee Film Festival is FOMO 鈥 for example, foodies who missed the sole screening of "Menus-Plaisirs Les Troisgros," Frederick Wiseman鈥檚 four-hour documentary about a lauded French restaurant, will have to settle for streaming it via PBS 鈥 but fortunately the fest鈥檚 final week offers extra helpings of many key attractions.

(Eric Beltmann teaches film and literature in West Bend. He has written about cinema for print and web outlets since 1991.)

Juliette Binoche and Beno卯t Magimel star as food connoisseurs in Tr芒n Anh H霉ng鈥檚 "The Taste of Things." H霉ng won best director at the 2023 Cannes Film Festival.

Photo courtesy of Milwaukee Film

Beltmann

A day-by-day approach to the best of the rest of the fest

A day-by-day approach to the best of the rest of the fest

  • Updated

The Milwaukee Film Festival started April 11 and runs through April 25. The following are suggestions for each remaining day of the festival.

"We鈥檙e famous!," crow two senior citizens after learning they are the subject of a Silver Alert.

Geezer jokes are pumped intravenously into "Thelma" (7 p.m., Oriental Theatre), an agreeable comedy starring June Squibb as a grandma determined to recover $10,000 from a phone scammer.

While bluntly making its point about retaining agency in late life, "Thelma" cleverly spoofs action spy capers 鈥 one priceless gag involves closing a pop-up ad as if defusing a bomb 鈥 and warmly embraces its characters, including those played by Richard Roundtree, Parker Posey, Clark Gregg and Fred Hechinger, one of our most exciting young actors.

If you can鈥檛 make it to "The Taste of Things" formal dinner, "Late Night with the Devil" (9 p.m., Avalon Theater) offers a spicy midnight snack. Presented as the long-lost recording of a 鈥70s TV talk show that was buried after a live Halloween broadcast turned unholy, this twist on the "found footage" genre sends up the late-night format with considerable period accuracy and gleeful practical effects. It鈥檚 flawed, but there鈥檚 dark art in how it equates supernatural evil with the ratings- seeking malevolence behind every TV鈥檚 glow.

After co-directing "The Little Mermaid," "Aladdin" and "Moana," John Musker retired from Disney in 2018 and decided to make "I鈥檓 Hip," his own handdrawn cartoon. The four-minute result, which was shortlisted for an Oscar, is included in MFF鈥檚 "Shorts: Let鈥檚 Get Animated" program (9 p.m., Avalon Theater).

Featuring an insufferable cat declaring his "hipness" through song and dance, the movie possesses a jazzy, throwback spirit that, for me, made it the clear standout in a collection with no duds.

Twenty years ago I saw "Dig!," Ondi Timoner鈥檚 revealing music documentary about a seven-year span in the lives of Anton Newcombe and Courtney Taylor-Taylor, the respective frontmen for the Brian Jamestown Massacre and the Dandy Warhols. They were neighbors, friends, admirers and bitter rivals. For "Dig! XX" (7:45 p.m., Downer Theatre), a digitallyenhanced anniversary edition, Timoner has added 35 minutes of previously unseen footage.

With back-to-back screenings at the Oriental Theatre, enterprising filmgoers can fashion a "compatriots" double feature of new works made by contemporary Japanese masters. Come for Hirokazu Kore-eda鈥檚 "Monster" (2 p.m.) and stay for "Evil Does Not Exist" (5 p.m.), Ry没suke Hamaguchi鈥檚 follow-up to his Oscarnominated "Drive My Car."

Set in 1992, Minhal Baig鈥檚 "We Grown Now" (7 p.m., Oriental Theatre) sensitively traces the adventures of Malik and Eric, a pair of young best friends living in Chicago鈥檚 Cabrini-Green public housing complex. Some of the dramatic moments falter, but this family affair, screening ahead of its nationwide release on May 10, finds its rhythm when striving for poetry rather than realism.

"Gasoline Rainbow" (9 p.m., Times Cinema), which opens later in May, follows a group of teenagers who drive off to see the Pacific. By hiring non-actors and encouraging improvised scenes, directors Turner Ross and Bill Ross IV have once again blended fiction and nonfiction. Their impressionistic "Tchoupitoulas" was one of my highlights of the 2012 Milwaukee Film Festival, so I鈥檓 eager to see this new film, especially since it鈥檚 been compared favorably to "Easy Rider" and "On the Road."

More straightforward storytelling propels "Io Capitano" (4:30 p.m., Oriental Theatre), an Oscarnominated Italian film about two na茂ve Senegalese boys making a perilous Mediterranean voyage to Europe. This unsparing migrant saga sometimes treads water 鈥 you鈥檝e seen these horrors before 鈥 but director Matteo Garrone injects surprisingly fantastical touches and wisely lets Seydou and Moussa be fully realized people, dreamers and maybe even heroes, rather than object lessons.

The full lineup plus ticket and venue information are online at mkefilm.org/mff.

鈥 Eric Beltmann

Director John Musker filled the cartoon short "I鈥檓 Hip" with more than 120 caricatures of friends and colleagues from his four decades in animation.

Photo courtesy of Milwaukee Film

Caffeine fiend

Caffeine fiend

  • Updated

Dear Annie: I work in a small office with only four employees and one supervisor. Two of my colleagues and I are coffee drinkers. Instead of starting a coffee fund, we started taking turns bringing in a fresh container when we find the previous one is running low. This system has worked for us and has prevented any issues from arising.

What we do have an issue with is our supervisor helping himself to the coffee without ever offering to chip in for his share. This has been going on for almost a year, and the three of us are really getting fed up. It has gotten to the point where we will purposely get less coffee just so he won鈥檛 have a chance to get any. I realize this might be petty, but I don鈥檛 know how to make him understand that he is taking advantage.

All we want is for him to contribute his fair share.

How can we approach this subject with him? What can we say to make him realize he is in the wrong?

鈥 The Fa"brew"lous Three

Dear Fa"brew"lous Three: The way you signed your letter indicates an exclusive club in which outsiders might not feel welcome. Now, since the troublemaker is your boss, the three of you have to make a decision: Is it worth it to upset your supervisor? If not, then decide in advance that the three of you will pay for him.

But if you really resent that 鈥 because it is unfair 鈥 then I would suggest putting a coffee plan for the office in writing and asking everyone who drinks coffee, including the supervisor, to participate. The plan should be impersonal: If three workers participate, the cost 鈥 or responsibility for bringing a container 鈥 will be so much, and if four people participate, the cost per person will be that much less. If he refuses to participate and continues to drink your coffee, then you can either tell him to cut it out or report his behavior to his boss.

The main thing is to keep it impersonal. Don鈥檛 attack him for being a mooch.

Just lay out the numbers for everyone to see.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

DEAR ANNIE

Annie Lane

Struggling to make, keep friends in a new city

Struggling to make, keep friends in a new city

  • Updated

Dear Annie: I have a friend, "Donna," who lives in another state. We鈥檝e been friends for three years. Due to past trauma of being cheated on, I have trust issues, not just in relationships but friendships as well. I鈥檝e damaged and even lost a few friends because of these issues.

Donna is an introvert and doesn鈥檛 want to talk all the time. I鈥檓 more extroverted. When she says she can鈥檛 or doesn鈥檛 want to talk, I have doubts about our friendship and it causes fights between us. It hurts because I know she鈥檚 a true friend, but I struggle to bring myself to trust her because I think about what I鈥檝e experienced before.

Truth be told, ever since I moved, I鈥檝e missed having a true friend who鈥檚 close by. Making friends where I moved to has been a struggle. I鈥檝e tried counseling, but it is expensive. I want to go, but affording it is a challenge. I dislike where I moved from but miss the hell out of my friend. Please help.

鈥 Lonely in Wyoming

Dear Lonely: Don鈥檛 take Donna鈥檚 introversion too personally.

Everyone has different communication styles, and just because yours don鈥檛 exactly match doesn鈥檛 mean she doesn鈥檛 still love and value your friendship. Let her know how much you miss her and how you鈥檝e been struggling in isolation after your move. Suggest that you set a standing date 鈥 once a week or every other 鈥 for a phone call or FaceTime to catch up and keep in touch.

As for settling in in your new city, put your extroversion into volunteering, joining a club or hitting some local scenes to meet people who share your interests.

There might also be online therapy or low-cost counseling near you that鈥檚 more affordable than the options you鈥檝e already looked into.

Remember that growth takes time. Be gentle with yourself.

Dear Annie: I wanted to take a moment and let you know how much I enjoy your column; I think you give the best responses to your readers. I do not have a question, but rather some valuable advice for your readers.

You see, I grew up in a home with a toxic marriage modeled by my parents. I remember being about 10 when my mom found out about my dad鈥檚 affair and we rode around with a baseball bat, searching for the "other woman."

Fast forward, they just celebrated 50 years together, and my dad calls me complaining about my mom, and my mom calls me complaining about my dad. I am frankly TIRED of it. If you are in a bad marriage, consider this your approval to end it. I married a man who my counselor said was cut from the same cloth as my mom. It is true! We model and are drawn to it and don鈥檛 even realize it.

My mom always taught me that you stay no matter what. I am about to graduate college and will be a social worker. I am so excited to empower/teach others to end what does not serve them. Love is not enduring unlimited abuse, and you don鈥檛 get a trophy for the years you stay. This really damages the children; they typically grow up modeling the same stuff they鈥檝e seen, and when you put them in the middle, it sucks! The more I heal, the more dysfunction I see.

鈥 Willing to Walk

Dear Willing: Thank you for your letter and wise words. I鈥檓 sorry to hear about all the traumas you鈥檝e experienced but am glad they have given you such a strong sense of self-worth and awareness of what you deserve. I agree it鈥檚 so important to protect ourselves, our mental peace and overall well-being. Here鈥檚 to letting go of the things that do not serve us.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

Dear Annie runs daily in the newspaper.

"How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?" is out now! Annie Lane鈥檚 second anthology 鈥 featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation 鈥 is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing. com for more information.

DEAR ANNIE

Annie Lane

Cream of the Cream City Cinema crop

Cream of the Cream City Cinema crop

  • Updated

MILWAUKEE 鈥 While most teenagers premiere their videos in front of family squeezed onto the living room couch, Zach Church will debut his latest movie on the big screen in front of hundreds of filmgoers.

Struggles with sweating

Struggles with sweating

  • Updated

Dear Annie: I am 76 years old, have taught school for over 40 years and have given thousands of lessons in the classroom. I have officiated for more than 50 years, preached for over 20 years and given hundreds of sermons, including at funerals and weddings.

But the main issue I have had since I was 8 years old is sweating profusely when feeling enclosed or trapped or when highly anxious. It started in front of the class in fourth grade.

My parents took me to doctors, going out to a big hospital in Minnesota, and tried hypnotism, therapy, pills and so many other things. No one can figure it out.

If it is cold enough or windy enough, if there are fans going or if the speech is short in time, then I feel safer. I鈥檓 not sure if this is fixable ever, but maybe?

I have spent lots of time and money and gotten myself into such a lather looking ahead to what I have to do. I am wondering if there is any way out of this.

I鈥檝e tried everything else, and I am writing to you to ask how others have handled this.

鈥 Lifetime Sweating

Dear Lifetime: I鈥檓 going to print your letter to see if others have solutions for you. In the meanwhile, I would recommend that you read a great book called 'The Body Keeps the Score' by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D. The book addresses the issue of traumas that are hidden in the body and can have physical symptoms when not dealt with psychologically.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

Dear Annie runs daily in the newspaper. "How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?" is out now! Annie Lane鈥檚 second anthology 鈥 featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation 鈥 is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information.

DEAR ANNIE

Annie Lane

Rekindling a romance 40 years later

Rekindling a romance 40 years later

  • Updated

Dear Annie:听I鈥檝e recently reconnected with a former coworker with whom I had lost track of after her first husband committed suicide. She divorced her second husband when she found him in bed with another woman. She has an adult son from her second marriage.

Other Publications

Midwest premiere of 鈥楥lockmaker鈥檚 Daughter鈥 has its own story

Midwest premiere of 鈥楥lockmaker鈥檚 Daughter鈥 has its own story

  • Updated

By Eileen Mozinski Schmidt

Special to Conley Media

Sarah Jo Martens was listening to her Broadway playlist on the online streaming service Spotify in the fall of 2020 when a song caught her attention.

"This song called 鈥楥lockwork鈥 came on. It took my breath away. It was poetic and beautifully written. The score was incredible. It was a powerhouse of a song," said Martens, who quickly dove into an internet search to find out more about the song and the production.

She learned it was part of the musical "The Clockmaker鈥檚 Daughter," however there was little additional information available.

"There was almost nothing online. It was a new musical, straight from London," said Martens, who is part of the area musical theater community at Lake Country Playhouse in Hartland.

In the weeks that followed, Martens continued to check back on the musical score for updates.

"Every time I checked back, more of the album had been posted," said Martens, who began to regularly stream the music.

Martens listened to the songs as they were made available, and soon could follow almost the entire story line of the musical.

So when Lake County Playhouse had a planning committee meeting, Martens suggested the possibility of including "The Clockmaker鈥檚 Daughter" in the seasonal lineup.

With approval from the committee in hand, a request was submitted to the musical鈥檚 rights company in London.

The first attempt did not yield results, as the company was not considering U.S. productions at the moment. But a second request awhile later worked and Lake Country Playhouse was able to secure the rights to premiere the show in the Midwest.

"The Clockmaker鈥檚 Daughter" will open on Friday with Martens as director.

"It鈥檚 such a treat," said Martens, of being able to unveil the show regionally.

The show is set in a town called Spindlewood in 19th century Ireland, according to Martens.

"It revolves around the clockmaker, Abraham. He is in the depths of grief over the loss of his young daughter," she said, explaining how he then builds an automaton resembling his daughter.

But when he turns the key, the automaton comes to life in ways the clockmaker cannot quite understand, Martens said.

"She has the beautiful childlike wonder and wants to explore the world outside," said Martens, who described the story as covering "the depths of grief but also hope."

The music includes traditional musical elements and Irish folk music, according to Martens, who described the process of staging the show locally as "a magical journey."

"It is an exciting process to undertake; something new like this," she said.

Sandra Renick, artistic director of Lake Country Playhouse, said the journey from discovery of the music to securing the production rights has been "fascinating."

Lake Country Playhouse is "one of the first in the country to showcase the show, adding a layer of excitement and exclusivity to the production," Renick said.

Martens recently traveled to Ireland, and found a variety of inspirational sources from local festivals and the atmosphere of craic, or welcome, to things as simple as the cobblestone roads.

The Irish tradition of oral storytelling captured Martens as well. One of her favorite lines from local sources was: "Don鈥檛 let the truth get in the way of a good story."

Lake County Playhouse shows often sell out, so Martens encouraged interested theatergoers to get tickets early.

The show, featuring music by composers Michael Webborn and Daniel Finn, will run from Friday through April 21.

"There was almost nothing online. It was a new musical straight from London.

鈥 Sarah Jo Martens, huge fan of "The Clockmakers Daughter"

Constance (played by KyraJo Petit-Walla), the girl made of clockwork, comes to life after her maker winds her. Abraham, the Clockmaker (Cory Klein), looks on in awe at his creation.

Photo by Breanne Brennan

A note to stressed-out caregivers

A note to stressed-out caregivers

  • Updated

Dear Readers: A recent column about the caregiver who felt worn out prompted a deluge of letters, mostly from others who are, or have been, caregivers themselves. As I read the letters, I thought of the fact that airlines tell mothers to put on their own oxygen masks first and then help their children. Here is a sampling of the letters we received: Dear Annie: Please add to the caregiver ("Not Good Enough") that human beings have a finite mental capacity for each day. This is why Steve Jobs wore a black turtleneck and jeans every day; it left him mental room for more important decisions.

Caregiver is mentally exhausted due to the load he or she is carrying and needs to find ways to lessen that burden. Too many people don鈥檛 realize the impact of stress on functionality and hold themselves to too high a standard.

Caregiver should decide what tasks are most important for them, get help with things that are needed but that others could do, and focus on the tasks that would make them feel happy and productive.

鈥 Therapist in Illinois

Dear Annie: First, let me start by saying that reading your column is the marriage to my morning cup of coffee. I have never responded or written to you, but I just read about the caregiver who is taking care of their partner and is overtaken by exhaustion. Your response was to seek community support, local resources, etc. You neglected to also suggest seeing her physician, as there may be underlying health issues that are causing her exhaustion. Taking care of herself is taking care of her loved one! Thank you for the caring advice over the years.

Everyone can relate to someone else鈥檚 life challenges.

鈥 Helping the Caregiver

Dear Annie: Depression is a common occurrence in caregivers. There are support groups online for caregivers of dementia, Alzheimer鈥檚 and other conditions. While you may feel absolutely alone, there are others who are going through almost the same thing you are. You already reached out, writing to Annie 鈥 that鈥檚 an incredible first step, and if you do a quick Google search on caregiver support groups, many resources can pop up.

Maybe some local support groups, but most likely online groups.

I鈥檓 the sole caregiver of my husband with severe combat-related PTSD; he is in his early 30s.

The online support I found is amazing, because the people I know in person do not have real life experience with the everyday struggles that we have. It鈥檚 so helpful to have a support system, even if it鈥檚 just a message online asking if you鈥檙e OK from someone who knows what you鈥檙e going through. Caregiving isn鈥檛 for the faint of heart; you are your husband鈥檚 lifeline, and in order to be the best for him, you have to take care of yourself, too. Keep going, it鈥檚 not an easy road and it doesn鈥檛 get easier, but you don鈥檛 have to go it alone. You鈥檝e got this!

鈥 Another Caregiver

Dear Annie: Having been a caregiver, I know firsthand how this lady feels. When you are taking care of everything, you are forgetting about your needs, and one of the most important is your own health. Please take care of yourself so you don鈥檛 end up with a bad disease like I did. You are suffering from stress and that鈥檚 why you are tired, which could damage your health. If family isn鈥檛 close, contact a church, neighbors or even some online help. I wish my husband was still here but wish I would have taken care of me, too.

鈥 Been There Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. Dear Annie runs daily in the newspaper.

DEAR ANNIE

Annie Lane

St. Patrick鈥檚 Day inspiration

Dear Readers:听Happy St. Patrick鈥檚 Day. Here are some famous and uplifting Irish blessings to add a little sunshine to your day.

Mediterranean-style beef meatloaf with mint couscous

Mediterranean-style beef meatloaf with mint couscous

  • Updated

You can have this entire meatloaf dinner on the table in 20 minutes. My secret for making a quick meatloaf is to bake it on a baking sheet, which allows hot air to circulate all around the meat for quick cooking.

The side couscous dish can be made while the meatloaf is in the oven. I use pearled couscous. It鈥檚 pasta that is rolled and toasted into small, round balls.

HELPFUL HINTS:

Any type of olives can be used.

Any type of mushrooms can be used.

Ground bison can be used instead of lean ground beef.

COUNTDOWN:

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees.

Assemble ingredients. Start the meatloaf. While meatloaf is in the oven, make the couscous.

SHOPPING LIST:

To buy: 3/4 pound 95 percent lean ground beef, 1 container frozen chopped onion, 1 container button mushrooms, 1 jar minced garlic 1 bottle dried sage, 1 bottle dried thyme, 1 container pitted black olives, 1 bottle ketchup, 1 container pearled couscous, 1 bag pine nuts and 1 bunch fresh mint.

Staples: olive oil, salt and black peppercorns.

Recipe by Linda Gassenheimer 2 teaspoons olive oil 1 cup frozen chopped onion 1/2 cup coarsely chopped button mushrooms 2 teaspoons minced garlic 2 teaspoons dried sage 2 teaspoons dried thyme 3/4 pound 95 percent lean ground beef 12 pitted black olives, cut into quarters 2 tablespoons ketchup Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Line a baking tray with aluminum foil and set aside. Heat oil in a nonstick skillet and add onion, garlic, dried sage, dried thyme and mushrooms. Saut茅 3 to 4 minutes over medium heat, until the mushrooms are soft. Remove skillet from the heat and mix in the beef. Add the olives and continue to mix. Make sure all of the vegetables are mixed into the meat. Shape the beef mixture into 2 loaves about 6 inches by 3 inches and place on the baking sheet. Bake 15 minutes. A meat thermometer should read 155 degrees. Remove the meatloaf from oven and carefully with a large spatula place one loaf on each of two dinner plates. Spoon the ketchup over the top of the loaves.

Yield 2 servings. Per serving: 369 calories (39 percent from fat), 16.2 g fat (4.8 g saturated, 7.7 g monounsaturated), 108 mg cholesterol, 38.7 g protein, 17.1 g carbohydrates, 3.1 g fiber, 316 mg sodium.

Recipe by Linda Gassenheimer 1 cup water 1/2 cup pearl couscous 2 tablespoons pine nuts 1/2 cup fresh mint, torn into small pieces about 1/4 to 1/2-inch 2 teaspoons olive oil Salt and freshly ground black pepper Add water to a medium-size saucepan. Bring to a boil. Add the couscous, cover with a lid, lower heat and simmer 10 minutes. Drain if any water is still in the pan. Add pine nuts, mint, olive oil and salt and pepper to taste. Stir with a fork. Divide in half and spoon onto the dinner plates with the meatloaf.

Yield 2 servings Per serving: 250 calories (31 percent from fat), 8.5 g fat (1.3 g saturated, 3.6 g monounsaturated), no cholesterol, 7.0 g protein, 36.6 g carbohydrates, 4.4 g fiber, 14 mg sodium.

( Linda Gassenheimer is the author of over 30 cookbooks, including her newest, "The 12-Week Diabetes Cookbook.")

Quick Fix

TNS

Learning it鈥檚 OK to lean on others

Learning it鈥檚 OK to lean on others

  • Updated

Dear Annie: Please give me your opinion. I am an 84-year-old widow. I have one child, a son, and one grandchild in town. My other children live hours away. I no longer drive. I am financially independent and have someone to come clean twice a month, drive me to run errands, go to the doctor, do grocery shopping and take me to the beauty shop.

I have taken care of my parents and my husband鈥檚 parents, and I know this can be very tiring. I truly hate to have to call on my children. I try to be careful, and I don鈥檛 spend unnecessarily. It adds up when you have to have extra help. My son is very caring, takes me to the doctor and never complains about helping me. I have friends who are in the same situation.

I had hoped my son would offer to go to the grocery store for me. It would save me some money. I hate to impose. I was ordering my groceries to be delivered after I had some issues with a different lady who was getting my groceries for me. I became concerned when I was having groceries delivered. I live alone and use a walker, and a neighbor pointed out that people who deliver groceries are well aware if you live alone. I have friends who are in the same situation and their children shop for them. Would I be expecting too much? Thank you.

鈥 Elder Eager to Stay Independent Dear Elder: You鈥檙e obviously a very thoughtful, financially responsible, independent senior. But just because you鈥檙e able to find solutions to your challenges doesn鈥檛 mean you should feel obligated to handle everything on your own all the time.

It sounds like your son is caring and more than willing to help in whatever way you need. As far as grocery shopping, it might not even register for him what a load off your plate his help would be since you鈥檝e been handling it on your own for so long. The next time you鈥檙e with him, just ask.

You鈥檙e not a burden nor is it an imposition 鈥 acts of love and service like this are exactly what family is for.

Dear Annie: This note is in regard to "Bummer Friend," who wrote in about her negative friend who lives alone, lost her leg and has limited ability to go out. It sounds like this woman could be severely depressed and could greatly benefit from professional counseling and perhaps antidepressants.

Depression can express itself in many forms, including anger, withdrawal and negativity. Also, asking the negative friend if she felt depressed might open an easier pathway to discuss her behavior and communication style and potential benefits of therapy.

Thank you from a loyal reader!

鈥 Another Idea

Dear Another Idea: Something like losing a leg can indeed trigger depression, and I appreciate you writing in to draw attention to that very likely possibility. It鈥檚 also always helpful to come from a place of concern 鈥 such as inquiring about a loved one鈥檚 health, whether it be mental or physical 鈥 rather than accusation when you hope to change someone鈥檚 behavior. Thank you for writing in.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

Dear Annie runs daily in the newspaper.

"How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?" is out now! Annie Lane鈥檚 second anthology 鈥 featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation 鈥 is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing. com for more information.

DEAR ANNIE

Annie Lane

Take control of your mind and money

Take control of your mind and money

  • Updated

Dear Dave, I鈥檓 trying to work my way out of debt, but it seems like something always happens to stall things or knock me backwards. I make $55,000 a year, I鈥檓 single and I have $15,000 in debt, along with a mortgage payment of $1,224 a month. I鈥檝e been trying to live on a budget, but I鈥檓 sti…

Good friend insists on reciprocating gifts

Good friend insists on reciprocating gifts

  • Updated

Dear Annie: I have a longtime friend who has serious trouble with gifts. It is very difficult to give her anything because she insists on "evening the score" by responding with a gift back to the giver. For instance, we comfortably exchanged token holiday gifts at my place, but my husband learned she liked a certain special candy we had on hand, so he gave her a box. She tried to turn down this gift and even checked on her phone to see what it had cost.

Two days later, she showed up at our condo with a beautiful but unexpected handmade item she had just created for us (she is a very talented crafter). She also will always slip me a $20 bill whenever I drive us to an event to which we are going anyway and that鈥檚 25 minutes away. If I say "thanks, but no need," she will hide it in my purse or tuck it somewhere I will discover later.

This makes me very uncomfortable as it seems she can鈥檛 accept a present of any kind if she feels she is beholden. I have thanked her and told her this is unnecessary (especially the gas money, as I have an electric car!), but this is a real issue with her that is getting worse. By the way, she is like this with everyone and showers her family with items although they have asked her to stop. I鈥檓 beginning to not want to go places with her, and any casual gift-giving is fraught with anxiety. Any suggestions?

鈥 Awkward in Florida

Dear Awkward: Your friend鈥檚 adamant reciprocation seems unnecessary and, indeed, awkward, but I have to imagine it鈥檚 coming from a heartfelt and genuine place.

The next time you find yourself in one of these giftgiving dances with her, try having a serious one-on-one talk about how it makes you feel. Maybe she just needs a reminder that real, meaningful relationships aren鈥檛 transactional. It might be better for your friendship if you two start showing your love for each other in nonmaterial ways.

Dear Annie: I am a survivor of some rather extreme physical and sexual abuse. Most people do not know this about me because it鈥檚 obviously not the kind of thing you tell many people. My issue is this: I don鈥檛 like to be touched and especially do not like to be hugged.

It鈥檚 different if it鈥檚 my kids or my husband, but I really don鈥檛 like other people hugging me. I鈥檝e had to just sort of deal with it so people don鈥檛 think I鈥檓 rude, cold or just don鈥檛 like them.

What鈥檚 the best way to navigate unwanted touching?

I鈥檝e considered a hazmat suit. ... Any advice would be helpful!

鈥 Hates Hugs

Dear Hates Hugs: Firmly and confidently communicate your boundaries. It shouldn鈥檛 matter why you don鈥檛 want to be touched: If you say no, the answer is no. A wave or quick handshake, if you鈥檙e open to it, should certainly suffice as a way to greet someone or leave a social setting.

At the end of the day, your true friends will respect your wishes and your space, no questions asked.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators. com. Dear Annie runs daily in the newspaper. "How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?" is out now! Annie Lane鈥檚 second anthology 鈥 featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation 鈥 is available as a paperback and ebook. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information.

DEAR ANNIE

Annie Lane